Why 2009 was fucking awesome

Seeing as there is only one day left in this year, I figured it's about time I write my last post of 2009 and reflect back on what made it fucking awesome - because it was, truly, an incredible year. I'll probably forget some of the reasons why, but I'll try and jot down as many as I can think of anyway! There were some bad times too, and it'd be stupid of me to ignore them because one has to take the good with the bad in life, but I won't dwell on them either because there's no point to that!

My 21st
On February 5th 2009, I hit the big 2-1. It wasn't something I was particularly looking forward to, especially since I'd been accepted into a new group of friends in late November/December of '08 and I wasn't sure if anybody would actually be around to celebrate it with me. One of the women I worked with at the time told me to get something for my mother, because 21 is a big age for the mother of a child too. So, I got her a big bouquet and left it with a card on the kitchen table while I trekked through the snow into town to get my second tattoo - a star in between my shoulder blades. Noodles accompanied me and squeezed my hand through it, encouraging me by asking "What would Corey do?" over and over. That night, I went to dinner with my mother (who cried over her gift) AND father, and siblings, to Yamamori, then afterwards Mam and I had cocktails in my favourite gay bar. After that, I met up with some of the people who managed to make it into town that night, in one of my favourite bars. Star turned up with a rose for me and the emo turned up to surprise me. It was a long night, but a good one. My proper celebration was the following Saturday, in another of my favourite bars. I got some of the most unconventional presents I've ever received, including chocolate skulls from Stella and a Batman book, starring me, from Sticky. It was another great night, but the celebrations didn't end there. The following weekend, Noodles and I headed to London for my birthday present. I was a bit ill while we were there, but we managed to tear it up and shop till we dropped all the same. My birthday, and the subsequent celebrations, calmed any fears I'd had about having no friends, being hated and never falling for anybody again. It was a very warming experience.

My going away party
Seeing as I was leaving to spend a semester abroad in Munich, I had to party in Dublin one last time before I left. So, I gathered as many of my friends as I could on my second last night in the city, in one of my all-time favourite bars, and proceeded to get well and truly hammered. I should probably mention that this night didn't exactly go smoothly... The emo got very upset with me for hooking up with Dill in front of him (something he still finds painful to discuss), Noodles was pissed off when one of his best friends pulled me despite the fact he and his girlfriend were only "on a break" at the time (neither he nor the girlfriend speak to me anymore, but whatever) and I yelled at Mewes for turning up and then subsequently trying to pull Star on the dancefloor. It was a messy night, but a great one. It was exactly the way I wanted to leave, without tears or drama or stupidity. I wanted a drunken, silly, fun going away party, and that's exactly what I got. On the bus home, I listened to Radiohead and sobbed quietly into the emo's shoulder. Scooby and I said an emotional goodbye and then Noodles and I stood on the freezing cold street for the first of many before our proper one the following day. I felt very light-headed that night, and the following night at dinner with my family. The feeling of inevitability about the whole thing was weird, but in a good way.


Erasmus in Munich
On February 28th, I began my Erasmus and, as a result, one of the best times of my life. I can't even begin to explain how much my time in Munich meant to me, how much fun I had, the amazing people I met, how much I learned about myself and life and friendship and living alone.. Erasmus was easily one of the best experiences of my life. Words cannot adequately express how much fun it was. It was incredible, life-changing, amazing... It was an altogether positive experience that I wouldn't trade for anything. I would go back and do it all again right now if I could, and I regret absolutely none of it. It hurt to return home and settle back into life in Dublin, and if I'm honest, after being in Munich, I realised that I don't want to spend my life in Ireland. My place isn't here. There's a whole world out there waiting to be explored, and luckily my chosen career can be carried out pretty much anywhere, so there's nothing really holding me back. Being on Erasmus built up my self-confidence to the point where I was able to let go of all of the negativity and hurt I'd been holding onto and just focus on living, being happy and figuring out who I really am. I took everything I'd learned home with me and I haven't let go of it since then. It was truly incredible. Not only did I get to see Munich, but I got to visit Berlin, Vienna, Augsburg, Nuremberg and Prague, to name but a few. I got a taste of what it's like to live by myself and I made some amazing friends. Charley, probably my best friend over there (besides Saz, of course), influenced me hugely and I really don't think I could've done it without her. I got the drunkest I've ever been, pulled people I can't even remember, carried my best friend down the street and danced in Goth clubs and basements in equal measure. It was the most fantastic time of my life and it went by way too quickly. I think about it every day and I don't know if I'll ever have another experience to equal it.

The gigs
Seeing as I spent half the year in Munich, I didn't get to attend as many gigs as I usually would have. However, in June, I managed to get to Rock im Park with the emo and two of the lads I'd met on Erasmus (one Irish, the other American). It was an odd group, and everything that could possibly have went wrong that weekend did, but it was still really good fun. Slipknot were, of course, the highlight of the three days, and they were totally worth standing in the freezing cold rain for an hour beforehand to see. The emo and I somehow managed to overcome everything that went wrong and come out of it still being friends (and more than that too, obviously) and I bawled like a baby the whole way home on the train after I dropped him off at the airport. Rock im Park was a very significant festival for me, because not only was it the only one I'd been to besides Download, but it was a completely different atmosphere to the others I'd been at. And it was fucking awesome. Besides RIP, Noodles hooked me up with a Metallica ticket for a gig two days after I returned home from Munich. I wasn't really in the mood for it, since I was suffering from post-Erasmus withdrawal at the time, but it turned out to be an awesome welcome back. Marlay Park, as always, came alive and Metallica stormed through their set. Whiskey in the jar was particularly emotive for me, for obvious reasons, but mostly it was just great to be doing something enjoyable back home, and with Noodles. We also went to see Dylan Moran with Scooby. That was fantastic. I've been a fan of his for so long and it was awesome to see him live and in the flesh. The last gig of 2009 was, of course, Paramore and I was unashamedly excited to see them again. They were fantastic, Hayley looked beautiful and it was a great night out with Saz and Niamh. It did make me feel a bit old to be surrounded by 15-year-olds in their underwear, but it was great fun nonetheless. It reminded me of how much fun rock gigs are - not that I'd forgotten! - and also how great it is to be young and spontaneous and without a care in the world.


The people
2009 was the year I sorted my shit out and not only made amends with people I'd pissed off in the past, but also cut out those who really had no place in my life to begin with. I'm sick of having to justify why certain people don't have any right to be a part of my life, but if I have to, I will and I'm not going to hold back anymore. There was one person in particular, who spent the best part of this year trying to force me into being friends with him again after I'd told him in no uncertain terms that he'd gone too far, whose harassment eventually drove me to change my number. It was sad, because we had been best friends for several years, but his abuse of the friendship was just too much and I began to realise, after some sound advice, that I was giving but getting nothing back. If that sounds extreme, it's because I haven't gone into detail about what this person did and said to me, and his unwillingness to accept my decision. I realised, probably while in Munich, that I have given certain people too many chances in the past. I have no intention of doing that again. Nobody has to work to be my friend. I ask for very little, but I'm not a pushover and I refuse to be treated like one. It took me losing all but a handful of my friends, and subsequently being accepted into a brand new group of people, for me to realise that I had gained far more than I'd lost. Now that that rant is over, I can begin to shower praise on those wonderful people who made this year as special as it was. The friends I now hold close to my heart are the best I've ever had, and although I'm not going to name names (because they know who they are), I will say that they are the most accepting, positive, intelligent, fun and interesting people I've ever met in my life. My life would suck and this year would have been shit without them. I am eternally grateful to them for accepting me into their lives. I don't know where I'd be without them.


My never-boring love life
2009 was the year I sowed my wild oats, so to speak. I pulled more than I ever have in my life. Not everybody agreed with it, but luckily the people who mattered did. One of the best things I heard about myself this year came courtesy of a chick who barely even knew me at the time, a good friend of Noodles, who stated "So she has a polyamorous relationship? At least she's honest about it. Who gives a shit!?". Strangely enough, she was absolutely right. I don't know why people had such a problem with what I was doing, seeing as it's nobody else's business and I was absolutely honest about it. But, as the months rolled past, I had to make a decision and, as I've previously stated, I chose my lovely emo to be my boyfriend. Dill is still one of my closest friends, Star is considered an ex without the negative connotations associated therewith, and we're still very close. So all's well that ends well. Although it feels weird to have settled down and have a boyfriend again, it's also really great to be in an honest, mature, adult relationship for the first time in my life. This is not my first adult relationship, but it is my first mature relationship. And, without gushing too much, he is the sweetest guy in the whole world, one of my best friends, one of the funniest people I know, so much fun to be around, so smart, creative, understanding, caring, silly, crazy, sexy....everything I've ever wanted in another human being, to be perfectly honest. The relationship is not effortless, because by their nature relationships are not, but it's pretty damn close. And honestly, I can't believe I ever settled for anything less, but one lives and learns.

The tatts
I got really, really into tattoos this year. I got three more in 2009, taking my total to four (and counting!), all of which had semi-significant meaning. The second was on my 21st birthday, a star between my shoulderblades as I've previously stated. That one, I chose on the spur of the moment. I hate star tatts, I think they'rea bit cliched, but I wanted something 21st-esque and that's what I got. The third was a heart being squeezed by a whip on my right shoulder - a pro-gay symbol which means love of women and love of fetish - that I got in Munich. It was difficult to ask for in German, but it was worth it. It's probably my favorite tattoo, not to mention the most meaningful. I love it. And the fourth was a second black heart on my left wrist, which I got on Halloween (the same day the emo asked me out), that was really just because I loved the symbol and wanted it on my wrist. It's a negative, dark symbol, but it means a lot. I love all four of my tatts and I have no plans to stop soon. They were a huge part of the year because they symbolised significant moments and they cost a hell of a lot of money!

The lows
I'm very glad to say that there were very few lows in 2009. I can't really think of any major ones, thank fuck, but I suppose there must have been a few. The most negative shit this year came courtesy of other people talking about me. However, I know who I am and what I've done. I know I'm not a saint, but I've never claimed to be. People still talking about me is a bad reflection on them, not me. Luckily, that doesn't really bother anymore. While I was in Munich, Star was approached several times by somebody (a mistake I made a long time ago). That pissed me off a lot, but I later found out that she handled herself quite well by informing him that we'd slept together many, many times and he didn't have a chance in hell with her. I don't know why this shit was still happening a year after the break-up, but whatever. Once again, bad reflection on him, not me. Mewes and I had a dreadful fight via email while I was away, too. He was very harsh and said some unforgiveable, ridiculous, completely false and very unfair shit that was, I was later told, said under the influence of drugs - surprise, surprise - which, in my mind, doesn't excuse it in the slightest. I'd love to publish those emails on here, but it doesn't bother me anymore so meh. He wasn't much of a friend and I don't miss his bullshit so oh well! The only other person I fought with was my mother. I walked out on her for a week and, when I returned, she decided to pretend the whole thing had never happened. I suppose that's the best I can expect from her. She's not a bad person or a bad mother, and I love her. I just don't necessarily like her all the time. Having said that, we ended 2008 on good terms and 2009 will end in much the same way, which I'm very pleased about. Overall, there weren't many lows this year. 2009 was a year of highs, for which I'm extremely grateful. Now time for some best ofs!!

Album of the year - Brand New Eyes - Paramore.
Gig of the year - Slipknot at Rock im Park.
Film of the year - I don't really have one... I didn't get to see many, but Harry Potter, Bruno and Adventureland were all great.
Book of the year - I don't know if it came out this year, but Bad Day in Blackrock by Kevin Power was fantastic.
Song of the year - Ignorance - Paramore. Not only was it the catchiest of this year, it quickly became my theme tune!
New obsession of the year - Mega64. My life would suck without these guys, it really would.
Comic/Graphic Novel of the year - My favourite is definitely the Scott Pilgrim series, but I'm not sure if any of them came out this year. Can't wait for the film next year!
Hottest chick - It's between Kat von D and Vikki Blows, for sure.
Hottest guy - Either Garrett Hunter or Noel Fielding. Yum.
Fashion icon - It's between Kat von D and Hayley Williams. I bow down to their almighty fashion sense. Wow.
Accessory of the year - My leather jacket. Love it. Or Docs!
Biggest achievements - Completing my semester abroad, losing a stone in weight, accepting myself, getting into a new relationship...

It's been a pretty fucking good year... I can't say that enough! I wrote more than I have in ages, met some amazing people, had fantastic experiences, drank a shitload, rocked out, worse some awesome clothes, pulled some hot people, discovered great new shit...and so much more! Here's to 2010 - the next decade is going to be even fucking better!!!

That's what you get

I went to see Paramore last night, one of my favourite bands in the world, for the second time (I saw them in the summer of '08 the same week I saw Radiohead - go figure) and they were AWESOME! I constantly have to justify my reasons for loving this band. Basically, I listen to their music because they're fun, they write catchy songs, Hayley has a fantastic voice, they can play (unlike lots of other, very popular, bands) and they really rock it out live. Of course, the O2 was flooded with emo kids and hipsters (grrr....) last night for the show, and I have to admit, in the beginning I felt very, very old. But then I got checked out by boys of about 15 years of age, and I felt all right again.

I ran into a couple of 18-year-old kids there (the emo's very rock 'n' roll cousin and his girlfriend) and they remarked that they were glad to see me because at least that meant they weren't the oldest people there. "What the hell ARE you doing here?" the cousin remarked, looking very shocked indeed. I unzipped my Slipknot hoodie (sacrilege to wear it to a Paramore gig, I know, but there were kids there in trenchcoats and Metallica tees so I wasn't the worst) to reveal my customized-to-shit RIOT! T-shirt, and he nodded knowingly. The Paramore T-shirts that were on sale at the gig were actually a bit shit, but kids were buying them up like crazy. I never had money when I was a teenager (I still don't actually), so I always bought my band tees big and made 'em into dresses or grungy tanks and shit (I still do that too, come to think of it...). I was happy with my grungy, last album tee. I felt like a proper fan, if there really is such a thing (I hate it when people say that, what does that even mean!?).

Before the main show, there were three emo support bands, of which we only saw one and a half. Based on what we caught, I'm guessing all three were dreadful. One just stood there making shapes, whining and playing electronic keyboards. Very odd, but the kids loved it. Saz was excited to see the main support, Youmeatsix, but was underwhelmed by their set, which as she put it, didn't really pack enough punch. At one point, the deliciously British frontman (oh, that dirty accent...swoon...) attempted to get the crowd to part and create circle pits. They probably tried, but I was laughing too hard to notice. Attention Youmeatsix lead singer: It's okay for Bring Me The Horizon to do that, because at least they scream and headbang and thrash around, but the lead singer of an emo band, wearing ill-fitting drainpipes, a tight T-shirt and a floppy fringe, should NEVER ask his fans to create circle pits because, well, most of them don't know what those are, and the rest are too afraid of getting crushed or messing up their outfits.

Speaking of outfits, my god some of them were a disgrace! I felt like an old woman thinking that, but seriously! I remember going to gigs half-dressed when I was 15, but that was mainly because I knew I wouldn't be able to jump about the place with a big coat on or a bag hanging off me. That and because I was so hyped up on excitement and energy for the gig, I didn't notice the cold. But these kids weren't just half-dressed and overly-confident, they were on another level entirely. Most of the outfits we saw could be better described as costumes. It was as if they were all trying to outdo each other by being the most emo, or the most slutty or the most unique, so to speak, because all following the same style means one is NOT unique. It was funny and upsetting at the same time, but definitely entertaining.

More shocking than their clothes, however, was the amount of kids (predominantly girls) being stretchered out of the arena before Paramore even came on. The emo's cousin said he'd spotted two being dragged out of the crowd before the first support came on. And we saw another being dragged out of the toilets after throwing up, presumably for a while since it was long enough to warrant security having to step in, when we'd only just arrived. It was sickening, but really confusing too. Something I never understood when I was that age, and still don't to this day, is why anybody would want to get hammered at a gig. I mean, after paying 40 or 50 or even 60 odd quid for the ticket, why ruin your night, or your friend's for that matter by drinking too much and vomiting everywhere and having to be taken out? Or worse yet, why put run the risk of missing the band completely? I don't get it, and I probably never will. It makes me sound old, I know, but I don't care. I will never understand why people go to gigs with the sole intention of getting wasted, thus missing the band(s). That's why Oxegen sucks so much, and why I'll never, ever go (even though Nine Inch Nails played last year). It is a festival that is more about the drinking and the atmosphere than the music. And who would pay 200 quid for that!? (lots of people, actually).

Anyway, the gig! Paramore came on at the shockingly late time of 9.30, but it was very shortly after Youmeatsix so it wasn't too bad. They played for an hour and 15 mins, which was quite short indeed, and begged the question - why so many fucking support bands!? Why not just Youmeatsix, a break and then the main attraction at 9. Or even 8.30, which was considered late when I went to my first gig in the Point (Foo Fighters in 2002). They opened with a song I didn't recognise, although it was probably from the all right new album, Brand New Eyes (too many slow songs for my taste, not enough rock-out moments). Hayley wore black drainpipes, black Nike runners and a red tank top emblazoned with the cringeworthy slogan "Rather be DEAD (crossed out) ALIVE". Still, she looked gorgeous and very natural as always. Her hair is now bleached blonde, which suits her but looked a bit dry. She had very little make-up on, maybe a bit of mascara and light foundation if anything at all. I love her, she's fucking awesome.

They launched into Ignorance, the first single and standout track of the new album, second after the opener, which drove the crowd (including me) absolutely mental as we jumped about eagerly, screaming along with her at the top of our lungs. I think they should've opened with that, but I guess they wanted to mix it up a bit, and it sounded great even second.

The short set flew by, but hits like That's What You Get, Crushcrushcrush, Emergency and Pressure were stormed through with aplomb. Hayley jumped about, head-banged and danced nerdily (probably not a word, but it should be) like she was having as good a time as we were (which she apparently was, commenting on how amazed she was by the size of the venue and their ability to fill it). There was an edge to the proceedings, too. As a band, they were tighter than last time, and the guitar work was more interesting, slightly different to how it appears on the albums. Her singing, as always, totally blew me away. She has an incredible voice, and it really holds up well live.

There were a few slow songs, maybe three, that sort of dragged the set down a little bit. Paramore have a decent amount of slow songs to choose from, the best of which is We Are Broken, which they for some reason don't like playing live. Instead, a couple from the new album were taken out, such as a very sweet The Only Exception (done on acoustic guitars with a sea of mobile phone lights dancing all around). They held up okay live, but I found myself itching for the next upbeat track so that I could hop about again. The thing about Paramore is that they have a great, much bigger back catalogue to choose from than most people realise. That's what made the song choices both weird and understandable, depending on which way one looks at it.

The rest of the Brand New Eyes tracks they chose to play held up very well live indeed, much more than I'd anticipated, in particular Careful, Where The Lines Overlap, Looking Up and Turn It Off (which begins with the cringey lyric "I cut my knees while I was praying"). They didn't play my favourite off the album, Feeling Sorry, much to my disappointment. I thought they'd definitely play it, because it kicks so much ass on the album, but meh.

Other notable exceptions were For A Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic, All We Know, My Heart, and, most shockingly of all, Born For This (their fan anthem, nearly always played near the end of the set, it always gets a massive reaction from the crowd). These fan favourites were probably left out to make way for newer tracks, which is understandable, but still kind of sucked.

That brings me to my next point, the very strange encore choices. After coming back onstage, all dressed in Irish jerseys, Paramore kicked autographed footballs out into the audience, and Hayley gleefully told us that they had a few more songs for us. And then they launched into...Misguided Ghosts (!?), yet another slow one, from Brand New Eyes. Hayley sat on a speaker and dangled her legs over the crowd, while being accompanied by the two lads on acoustic guitars. It was sweet and sounded great, but the buzz around me confirmed that everybody was waiting for the same thing.

Luckily it came directly after, thank fuck, when the little opening bit to Misery Business started up and Hayley counted us in, noticeably brimming with excitement. Misery Business is, according to Hayley and most Paramore fans, their best track to date. And it made the O2 jump last night, much in the same way the RDS did last year. It was INCREDIBLE. I felt like I was 15 again, and my neck is still killing me from it. They really rocked it out, to the point of exhaustion, and all I could think about afterwards, dripping with sweat and high on energy, was that the only song they could possibly finish with after that was Born For This.

Instead, for some unknown reason, they launched into Brick By Boring Brick, a decent enough song from the new album. We left just before it ended, not really having any desire to hang around for it, and discussed the odd setlist the entire way back into the city. I was buzzing with excitement, while the others were happy enough with it. I dunno whether it was because they expected something different, or they just weren't as into it, but I loved it anyway!

It was a great gig, even with the strange setlist choices. Hayley looked great and sounded amazing, the kids moved a lot more than last time (when they stood still as stone and gave out to us for jumping about) and the band were on top form. The standout moment was undoubtedly the last song before they left the stage, before the encore. Hayley led up to it perfectly, telling us "The last time we were here, I remember we were working on a song for a movie.." (cue hysterical screaming). All right, Twilight may be a bit shit, but Decode is a fucking fantastic song. The crowd screamed it along with Hayley, louder than we'd been all night, and it sounded fucking amazing. Not only that, but it felt amazing to hear it live. I couldn't contain my excitement, I was like a little fangirl or something. I tried to call my little sis, but later found out she was sick in bed and couldn't pick up the phone (she was devastated when she heard what song I'd been trying to call her during). It was truly incredible, one of the best gig moments of my life. I can't explain how it felt, it was like when Slipknot did SIC the first time I saw them, or Dead Memories the second time. Or Metallica doing Whiskey In The Jar. Or MSI doing Faggot. It's just that moment when the room around me dissolved and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. Truly mind-blowing.

Paramore are a band that are written off a lot, partly because of their strong religious background, partly because most music reviewers dismiss them as just another emo band (that means you, Irish Times ents listings writer) when they are, in fact, much more talented than a lot of the other shite out there and not even technically classified as "emo". There was no comparison between Youmeatsix and Paramore last night; the former just weren't as tight or as inventive. I saw My Chemical Romance a couple of years ago, at a festival, and I've stood up for them ever since as maybe being a bit pathetic, but still having put on one hell of a show and genuinely been able to do their songs live. Paramore are one step better than them. Not only can Hayley fucking sing, but they can play. And that's all I really ask for from a band - that they can play, do their songs some justice live, that they care about their fans, they give value for money, do something different and, most importantly, create music that I enjoy listening to and want to listen to all the time. Paramore, for me, tick all of those boxes.

I got a lot of shit for going to see them last night, but I had an absolutely amazing time and even though the set was weird and a bit short, they were really, really great. I'd go see them again tonight if I could! They didn't disappoint, and musical elitism is bullshit anyway so I'll wear my RIOT! tee proudly and not give a shit because, really, that's just me. I'm so sick of people trying to prove a point. Just like what you like and fuck what everybody else thinks.


Song of the day: Paramore - Decode.

What a life I do lead

It's been a while since I've updated this... Shit...

I've just been for a run in the cool, crisp Dublin night air and I'm feeling energetic so I'll give this a go and see what I come up with.

The last ten days or so have been INSANE. After being royally fucked over by our German lecturer, who after five years of doing this course still doesn't know what the fuck she's doing, the eight other students in my class and I were left with a week to create a 28-page bilingual glossy called Ausblick. It was ten days of absolute hell. I barely left the newsroom at all except to go to a few choice lectures and, halfway through last week, it was announced that the public service strike wasn't going ahead so I was left with a day to come up with a presentation on my dissertation topic. I got it done somehow, and surprisingly enough it went pretty well. I even made my lecturer laugh with a photo of Miley Cyrus eating an ice-cream (my dissertation topic isn't completely stupid, really). I thought what I'd chosen was a bit silly but the more I research it, the more I love it. If I were Dill, I'd come up with some way to make it really deep and meaningful. But sadly I am not, so I'll just stick with my Miley Cyrus ice cream slurping photos.

I learned I had a flair for layout while struggling to put the magazine together, and the finished product looked absolutely fantastic (although we won't get to see the hard copy until next week). I ended up being on the front cover too, which was a bit weird but it fit into the theme of it so meh. The emo photoshopped the hell out of the image and made it look really cool, too. All of our hard work paid off but, as usual, people who didn't pull their weight still got credited. It's the same way across the board, so I suppose there's no use in complaining about it really. People from another class (I won't say which) were complaining about one person in particular not pulling his/her (ooh which is it) weight and I was amazed that, having worked with him/her for four years, they hadn't figured out yet that he/she is completely unreliable. I sympathised with them, though, because we all know what it's like to have to work with shitheads. Which is exactly why I'm doing radio this year...urgh...

I haven't been out since Dill's 21st, which is absolutely pathetic. The closest I came to it was dragging the emo to see New Moon the weekend before last. First, let me just say that I am not, nor have I ever been, a fan of the Twilight series. They are dreadfully contrived, badly written fantasy novels dreamed up by a woman with serious emotional problems. Reading them makes me both bored and annoyed, and dealing with so-called twihards, although often quite amusing, infuriates me after a bit. However, I am a huge fan of Kristen Stewart in all of her awkward, rock 'n' roll hotness, and I didn't want to miss an opportunity to see her running about the place all moody with her brow furrowed and her fringe in her eyes. I was very pleased to find that there were several scenes in which she did not wear a bra and another extended running sequence during which I got a good look at her tits (under her top - boo), which are about the same size as mine but still nice. She is a very, very sexy girl. Mmm...


She also wears Cons with everything, which I think is so cool. In fact, I wore Cons all of last week with everything so I could be just like her. I told the emo afterwards and he remarked that I'm more of nerd than I first appear. He's probably right, but I don't care because I never claimed to be cool anyway.

As for the others, Footface (Rob Pattinson to normal people, RobPatz to fangirls) was more wooden than in the previous film, if that's humanly possible. Luckily, there wasn't a lot of him in it. The visions Bella has in the book were done very badly, so much so that he looked like a hologram about to launch into Princess Leia's speech from Episode Four (which is really episode one, becaue I discount the new Star Wars movies on account of their utter shittiness). Although I found the reveal of Pattinson's painted-on torso very amusing indeed. The native American looking lad who everybody is creaming their pants over, even though he is a 17-year-old with a six pack, did a hell of a lot better than I thought he would. Of all of them, his and Bella's relationship was the most believable and their acting was probably the strongest. Charlie, Bella's father, is still my favourite character in the books and now the films, but it goes without saying that he did a kick-ass job. Suzi Crabgrass from Ned's Declassified (one of my favourite TV shows of all time) wasn't in it nearly enough, either. Or that kid who turns out to be the emo killer dude in All The Boys Love Mandy Lane (easily one of my favourite movies of all time, and a fucking deadly horror movie). Almost everybody else in the film seemed to have suffered some sort of mental condition since the first one. Or maybe that's just the kind of acting required for these films.

The pace was slow, the plot, as it does in the second book, is beginning to show its' holes (like, for instance, why the hell would this chick pick the dickhead who left her and manipulates her and treats her like shit over the best friend who adores her and saves her life and worships her!?) and the majority of characters are thoroughly unlikeable, but it wasn't the worst way to spend a couple of hours. And the emo even managed to fill up with junk food and crack a few jokes before he passed out from boredom.

My wee siblings and I had a free gaff last weekend, and my brother convinced me to have people over on Saturday night, but then decided to go out so it ended up being me, the emo and a few of our buds drinking and playing the new Super Mario Bros game on Wii till about 6AM. It was so much fun. My sister wanted to play too but she fell asleep quite early. I love that my mother has a Brit boyfriend now, because whenever she visits him, the emo and I get to spend proper quality time together and I'm reminded of how great this relationship is. And it really is. It's fun and honest and there are so little drama and headaches and problems. I'm myself around him and he loves me for it. We're nerdy and silly and comfortable together. One of my buds said the other day that a girlfriend to him is more like a best friend who he gets to fuck. I think I agree with that statement, because that's what it feels like with the emo. In the best possible way. I didn't think I'd ever want to be in a relationship again after my last one, and now here I am and I couldn't be happier.

Now that the magazine is finished, I've more time on my hands to write and work out and catch up with people (FINALLY got a chance to have dinner with Noodles last night and catch up a bit - great food and even better conversation, can't wait till we can go out and get hammered together) and do Christmas shopping and...feed my Mega64 obsession... I really do love them. I can't imagine what life would be like without them now! That probably sounds a bit mad, but they're just the funniest guys. And they're so nerdy. And they're totally living the dream. I'd love to come up with a mad idea with my friends and have people love it so much that we eventually could make a living out of it. But until then, I'm just going to have to try my best to get published. Which reminds me that there are only five chapters left in this wonderful story of mine... Noodles and the emo are dying to read the current one, but I've only done one draft of it and it still needs tweaking. It's so strange that I'm almost finished, I don't know how I'll feel when it's done. And discussing our German dissertation in class today just made me realise how much fucking stuff I still have to do. This year is disappearing and I'm starting to wish it'd slow down a bit. I mean, this semester is practically over. And after Christmas, I only have four months until I've to hand in both of my dissertations and finish college for good. It's a scary thought.

Maybe I should be working instead of bullshitting on this stupid blog!

Or maybe I'll just watch one more Mega64 video...


Song of the day: Jack off Jill - Fear of Dying.